One of the things I think people who haven't spent a significant amount of time living in dense cities miss is that you do very little "living" in your apartment.

I spend maybe two hours a day awake in my (reasonably large for SF) apartment during the week, tops. The rest of the time I'm at work or out in the city somewhere; I treat the local downstairs basically like my living room.

It's not a lifestyle for everyone, but I consider the entire city my living space and I don't think it's abysmal at all.