The decision to buy vs. rent is completely dependent & goal dependent. If you're in the bay area, buying really only makes sense if you have kids and want them to be in a good public school district. Otherwise, many houses are oversized and have extremely high repair costs. Finding a good rent controlled unit could be better, especially if you find a landlord who will repair things.

And anybody who is saying their property value went up, so it was worth it, you really couldn't know that at the time. It wasn't a given (tbf neither is the market going up). Also, it's not like the property actual increased in value due to some quality upgrade, it's due to artificial scarcity. If the political winds change to encourage more housing, that trend could reverse.

There are arguments that you can customize a house you own more and that's true, but that's not a financial argument. I don't think a lot of big renovations pencil out anymore the way people expect. Paying X to renovate a kitchen doesn't increase the value of the house significantly over X anymore because the costs are so high and the high inflation erodes your dollar value much more quickly than in the past.