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Comment by koliber | Hacker News Reader

I don't know if progress made it more hard to spend time with kids, on average.

In older generations, men spent relatively little time with little kids. I don't know if it was social convention or lack of time. Either way, it seems that now a lot more dads are spending time with kids than 2 generations earlier.

I agree that it is hard, but I would not paint a bleak picture.

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It was both, however where I lived, a few years before fathers would get up at 6am and go and work down a mine all day, or a shipyard or factory. They might get home at 6pm but after dinner they'd quickly go for a pint or go fishing or go to the football. Women often didn't work, or worked part-time so they could take the kids to school so saw a lot more of the kids and managed the household more.

Now women have the freedom to work, so both sexes can choose to avoid seeing their children if they want to. Bleak indeed.

> can choose to avoid seeing their children if they want to

The choice is there. It's sad how many people choose to not spend time with kids. But the fact that more people have this choice now than they did in the past makes me conclude that it is not as bleak.

Kids don't need dad's time. They observe and learn. Dad might minimally guide occasionally, but there shouldn't be an expectation for dads to sit with kids.

This kind of expectations makes it hard to have more kids.

I found that the time they spend with me, their dad, observing and learning how I do things, impacts them positively.

I don't know if they need it or not, but I do see that they benefit from it. And it feels good too.

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