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Comment by elyobo | Hacker News Reader

Is that why US service ("checking on the customer every few minutes") is so incredibly annoying...

It seems like the universal standard in my area is that the server plunks down my food dishes and immediately asks if I would like anything else with that. And I don't know about neurotypical patrons, but in my mind it is impossible for me to process whether I will need anything else while the server is standing right there, staring at me and waiting for me to answer. So invariably I am forced to say "no" and then, more often than not, I belatedly discover what it is that my meal also needed, and so I wait to flag them down again (this necessarily involves not picking up utensils and not eating anything, so that they notice there is something amiss.)

I really haven't been smothered by checkups every few minutes. When the servers are really good, they can anticipate when you need something by simply looking at you and your table. They know when your drink is empty and when you want it filled. A server should rarely need to ask that stuff verbally. If they are continually checking up, they are inexperienced or insecure.

After I make my order, the server will usually try and take my menu. Lately I've said "I'd like to hold on to this" and they love when you do that! I don't always follow-up with another order, but sometimes I just need an extra side dish, or a dessert.

I've had that overstaffed experience, too. There are one or two small chains around here that employ 3x as many servers as they need. And their rooms are always 1/5th full or less. So the moment I walk in, there are 3-4 people greeting me and escorting me to a table, before I can even pull off my hat and gloves. In the same place, while they don't appear to do "team service" I would meet one waitress, and then get fobbed off on another guy for no stated reason. If they are sharing tips, a lot of slices to that pie.

No. After you've ordered, it is rare to order anything else. You might ask for a refill of a beverage or something like ketchup, but the waiter is not expecting more ordering. It's simply expected by diners that their waiter is there and will help with whatever they need. In Europe you'll wait 20 minutes to get the attention of a waiter for salt or ketchup until your food is cold. Also in Europe this will be described not as dead time waiting for a small thing, but as culture. European culture.

Drinkers order more. Every cocktail is $2-3 for the waiter nowadays.

> In Europe you'll wait 20 minutes to get the attention of a waiter for salt or ketchup until your food is cold.

You could ask for the salt or ketchup when the meal arrives.

Also Europeans are not, I think, accustomed to asking for salt, or ketchup, on already seasoned food. So your request is actually unusual.

It's amazing how much is attributed to culture. What if I like more salt? European are not accustomed to ask for salt. What if the chef forgot to add salt? You'll wait till your food is cold. It's culture.

Do that many restaurants not have salt/pepper already on the table? Yes, I may ask for ketchup separately but salt is always provided.

I don't know about other European countries (well, I know, but I'm polite), but in France, restaurants will always have salt/pepper and frequently oil/vinegar on each table.

For ketchup, I'm afraid you'll need to stay in the US.

> What if the chef forgot to add salt?

That’s a perfectly valid reason for complaining, then. Politely, of course, but the chef might use the feedback.

Please stop spreading these... untrue statements, you clearly have very little experience with actual European restaurants. Any decent restaurant has salt&pepper available on all tables, if yours was cleaned and not put back just ask waiter politely. You know how to call a waiter, right? Not much more complex than raising hand at primary school.

One thing is true though, I never ever had to add salt in restaurant in past 25 years, one can ask for pepper/olive oil/etc but salt? They often use too much of it to enhance taste ie in sauces. Maybe get your kidneys and heart checked with such refined palate.

Forgot to add salt? Does that actually happen?

A chef forgetting to add salt sounds like a photographer forgetting to use a camera.

> Also Europeans are not, I think, accustomed to asking for salt, or ketchup, on already seasoned food.

I would expect to find salt, pepper and mustard on the table in a decent restaurant, in my corner of Europe. Not ketchup, though, except in a cheap burger place.

You would in the UK but we are a condiments culture. Quite normal to find two kinds of tomato relish, two kinds of mustard, and if the café is satanic, salad cream or piccalilli. But I don’t think I would dream of asking for salt or pepper or ketchup if they were not already on the table.

Imagine adding ketchup to a decent meal

> Also Europeans are not, I think, accustomed to asking for salt, or ketchup, on already seasoned food.

Not all us Americans are, either. The only time I can remember asking for such things is when the server forgot to provide ketchup for some fries.

If a restaurant doesn't season the food adequately for me, I'm not going to fix it at the table. I'll just factor that in the next time I decide where to eat.

Also, the vast majority of restaurants I've been to use far too much salt during cooking anyway.

So after you ordered the main meal, after you finished it, is it uncommon in the US to order something afterwards? Like coffee, dessert, an ice cream cup?

Most waitstaff attempt to be observant enough to watch their tables for empty plates, approach the table and clear them off, and ask at that moment if they would like to see a dessert menu.

I get asked (and expect to be) and I usually refuse.

So why do waiters in the USA keep pestering me every 5 minutes asking if I need something else? It's part of the culture, and it gets plenty annoying when I'm trying to enjoy a meal but have to stop mid-bite to say "no, thank you" when I'm clearly not in need of anything else.

The feeling I get from those experiences is that I'm being rushed to clear the table, not that the service is great and always there to help me.

The issue here is that you are adding ketchup to your food...

Ah yes the homogenous European culture. Can't say I've ever really experienced this anywhere other than when its obvious a restuarant is slammed. Spain is probably the worst place I've been for service but the standard is still generally very high, you just need to actually get someones attention they're not going to ask if you're ok all the time. Maybe this is a reflection of the standrd of the places you go or how you treat people?

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