Sadly your colorful description is not entirely accurate.
With LaTeX you're in hell immediately when you need to divert just the tiniest bit from what your \package of choice provides. Want a logo in that letterhead? Address format looks wonky? Need a nice looking table? An image in a table even? PDF output looks strangely different from dvi?
Well, any such seemingly trivial detail will be good for countless hours of scuba-diving around the ancient shipwreck of a language that is LaTeX. The little available documentation is usually only served in PDF format, sparse and contradicting. None of the packages interact with one another but most of them conflict in funny ways.
And no least the syntax and semantics of the language itself are closer to ancient greek than a modern markup- or scripting-language.
Yes, the LaTeX-output is pretty. But LaTeX must die. Take the algorithms and integrate them into software from this century please.