This is appalling. Without knowing the OP's life circumstances or much about the dynamic of human relationships for that matter, jumping to this kind of conclusions only make for a witty post, at best.

Raising kids who will want to "call their Dad" once grown up is hardly about letting them make as much noise as they wish at age 4.

I sometime envy how some people view life as a simple If-Then-This-That... Much easier to sleep at night that way.