Personally I don't have any beef with them, but when I ask people about the RoR community I hear lots of douchebagery stories.
One of the most frequent is how cocky everyone in RoR feels towards other programmers in other languages and how "cool" their framework is and so on.
This started towards PHP programmers, then moved to Python(Django) and recently it's Node.js who's getting lots of flames from them.
So yeah..
Reason I'm asking is that my main client works with Rails, but it's a big and rather old-world company where this choice was shockingly 'modern'. There's little to none off this sentiment you describe though. Rails was a pragmatic choice, so we use it.
Ruby itself is a great language, and that's what it is at the end of the day - it's just a language. What matters more is the community gather under it. As with any community, there are members that tend to be immature and arrogant which may reflect to anyone as a representation of the entire Ruby community as whole. Worse comes to worst, these "few members" can affect the culture of the community especially for new users of the language, turning the community and the language somewhat "cultish".
Maybe they're all trying to call on their inner DHH, or maybe they're really just assholes in real life, either way it sucks. Were these people you've actually met or were they online?