How do you say 'content-oriented design' with a straight face? What's the alternative? 'Helpful interactive design'? 'Clearly indicate where things are clickable design'?

I get that flat is meant to strip away unnecessary ornamentation, but depth has a purpose. We aren't living in a 2 dimensional universe. Our screens may be 2 dimensional right now, but that doesn't invalidate the use of depth to provide helpful hints to the user. Abandoning a tool in your toolbox because of misguided principles. You'd rather hit your nail with a wrench than use a hammer, you don't want to be seen using a hammer, that's not fashionable. Flat design is what happens when designers over-think problems at the expense of usability. Flat design is frustratingly naive. It's a revolution of the unexperienced who through desire to leave a mark, only left the impression that they wanted to make one. All at the expense of unhappy users.