I've written my fair share of esoteric prose but the text of this article reads as if spat out of a trendism algorithm app, barely trackable by the eyes of a brain attempting to discern some type of linguistic pattern - future anthropologists will likely assume a po-mo generator instead. I hope this was the intended effect. If not, I wish the author well on his recovery after he partakes in a Kerouacian backback to Tangier. Remember, don't fret the centipedes.
I was attributing my not-understanding of this post to a language barrier, but no, this post is solely and utterly bollocks. Nicely done.