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PaaS's are basically hosted specialized frameworks, and as such usually require framework-specific code. App Engine is Google's PaaS offering, and most of your issues seem to be "I don't want a PaaS, but prefer an IaaS or VPS".

As Google has an IaaS offering (Compute Engine), it seems odd that, given those complaints, you'd compare their PaaS offering against other provider's IaaS offerings.

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The brilliance of PHP is drop files in folders, voila, website.

As soon as you know the terms IaaS, VPS, and PaaS, you know too much to be using PHP.

So which language does a person of your knowledge use?

My money is on Haskell. Or is there another cool language on the block these days?

yes, PHP. https://github.com/ircmaxell/monad-php

This is an example of someone who's riding the hate PHP bandwagon. Honestly sick and tired of people who have no idea just what PHP is capable of who like to bash it because it's "cool".

I have come to a conclusion that the biggest haters are the ones who were unable to learn and fully understand the language. They are really quick to bash and hate because that's way easier.

Of course there are flaws and of course there are better designed languages out there, but PHP is not going anywhere.

It's a waste of time to even point it out.

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