So does everyone else. Ruby users don't advocate for ruby because they think ruby sucks. Replace ruby with any other language and the statement holds true.
>it has package management issues
No more so than other languages.
>Moreover because of its bizarre IO system (which mostly seems to exist for academic reasons, not for any practical purpose
What on earth are you talking about? Why is it that everyone I see posting "I totally like haskell but..." on HN displays a very basic ignorance of haskell? What is bizarre about the "IO system" in haskell? The fact that IO actions have a type? That is entirely for practical purposes.
>it demands the use of Monads everywhere
It most certainly does not. People use monads frequently because they are incredibly useful. You do not need to know what a monad is or how it works to use one.
>Last but certainly not least, its default laziness (once again, done mostly for academic reasons) can lead to bizarre performance issues, bugs which are hard to debug
The only criticism in your list that is actually loosely based on reality, and you still managed to get pretty far off-base. Haskell is not lazy for "academic reasons" (what does that even mean? Do you think they hand out phds for making a language "acadamic-y" enough or something?). Laziness was a choice, just as strictness is. It has pros and cons, just as strictness does. Being unfamiliar with laziness does not make laziness bad. For 90% of code, it doesn't matter. For 10%, you want to ensure strict or lazy evaluation. Regardless of which one is the default in your language, you want the other to be an easy to use option. This is the case in haskell.
>The amount of hoops to be jumped through to accommodate laziness in Haskell is significant, to say the least.
I have ~100k lines of haskell code in production. I have never even thought about having to "accommodate" laziness in any of that code. I have exploited laziness in a couple of spots as a free optimization, but otherwise it didn't even come up.