Having 4 kids, big house and car, expensive grave, need to travel, meet celebrities screams greed, irresponsibility and entitlement.
You could have not had 4 kids and had 2. You could have rented a place and bought a used car. The problem isn't wanting something better, the problem is that you decided to buy those things without earning it and with money you did not have. All these are choices you made as a person. And to take your family down with you is selfish and irresponsible.
Definitely won't be donating.