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Can't beat the local delicacy of salt'n'sauce on your chips here in Edinburgh!

Batter your Mars bar and deep fry that too

In batter. And the beer had better be Tennants.

Deep fried pizza in batter? Isn't that a "Pizza crunch"?

Nah, deep fried Pizza used to be what In got as a kid before the chip shops got proper pizza ovens. Just soaked up the oil...