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Can you MITM public wifi? Real question, but I thought the answer was "no", which would make public wifi a compelling counter-example.

I have no idea where you'd get the idea that the answer is "no". The answer is emphatically yes.

Yes. You arp poison the default gateway and route traffic through your own host instead.

Or spoof DNS responses to point to a machine under your control.

Or spoof a disassociation frame, then impersonate the access point so the victim connects to your computer instead.