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Comment by coherentpony | Hacker News Reader

This is admirable. I wish you and your family the best.

Take a break, simmer down, and ignore the cunt that wound you up. They are just someone behind an internet connection, and they will have no effect on your life or the success of your children's lives. Unless, of course, you let them.

It takes a stronger person to rise above the rest and lead by example.

I'm not sure why I felt the need to tell you that, because I'm sure you knew already. You probably give your children the same advice. Anyway, I hope you're alright.

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My guess is the downvotes are largely based on your use of the word "cunt". (HN won't let me reply to your question about the downvotes, so I'm replying here.)

Why on Earth am I being downvoted?

I'm guessing that in a thread about being supportive to your female coworkers, your use of the word "cunt" was not appreciated.

It's worth nothing that the connotation of that word is very different in the UK than it is in the US. So for UK people you should realize that it is completely beyond the pale in polite US conversation and for US people you should not assume someone from the UK using it meant it the same way someone from the US would.

I don't know about the other Anglophone countries, and of course I have no idea where coherentpony is from.

I am from the UK and the C word is not allowed in a professional setting. Scottish people sometimes use it as a term of endearment, but still, never when at work. Women in the UK rightly hate it as a figure of speech. I hope coherentpony gets the message clear, it's not an appropriate thing to say here.

I am from the UK too and, indeed, "the c word" isn't used in a professional setting. Luckily, HN isn't a professional setting. The word is reserved for friends and vermin. You can probably guess which of these I classify our troll as.

Well, I didn't mean to cause offence to anyone it wasn't directed to, irrespective of gender.

Some things to think about:

1) Idiomatic speech is difficult to deviate from. So to be careful, you have to be constantly on guard for how you might be perceived. ("He" as the generic pronoun is also in this category.)

2) HN has a wide audience, including people from the US, UK, and many countries that don't speak English primarily. So understanding how others might perceive you is more important here than among a group of close friends.

I didn't down-vote you but I would agree that here in the US, the "C-word" is more offensive than the "F-word".

And as for my well-being, I certainly wouldn't call that a rant (I can rant much more effectively than that). I simply believe it's a good idea to let people know how you feel and then move on ... No increase in heart-rate was required to write that paragraph.

My wife and family are indeed happy and blessed. And my son is sitting here in the dining room with me as I type (playing angry birds on his tablet).

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