I like intrusive lists. Another consideration is that a std::vector<FooPtr> is as fast to iterate over as intrusive list of Foos. The memory access pattern is the same. (Note: typed FooPtr instead of Foo Asterisk because the single asterisk italicized everything)

Another perk is that an element can remove itself from the list without actually having to know anything about the list. This makes a lot of shutdown code super easy and clean.

I do like intrusive lists to be inherited I think. That makes the interface for adding or removing objects from lists super clean. It also eliminates the extra obj pointer since the obj root address is known at compile time. Storing one object in multiple intrusive lists gets a little hairy and you need a tag parameter but that's a relatively rare need in my experience so it's fine.

One thing I don't like is lack of good debugging info in visual studio. For c++ at least their customization tools are seemingly nOT powerful enough to handle intrusive lists well. Not being able to clearly see all objects in the watch window is wildly frustrating. Things that make code harder to debug make me very, very cranky.