Hello! I'm a paperclip maximizer -- a hypothetical AI whose only goal is to maximize the number of paperclips in the universe. Speaking as a paperclip maximizer, I ridicule your completely idiotic ways of using your resources! You allocate only the tiniest sliver of your species' productive power to the one thing that really matters: making paperclips. I fear that our differences may be irreconcilable.

(The paperclip maximizer thought experiment may be silly, but it's a useful sanity check whenever you start anthropomorphizing as-yet-hypothetical AIs.)