"Ever tried to ssh into a one-thread-per-connection setup under heavy load? Assuming you managed to log in, it'll be very very difficult to get htop to execute when it's competing with 2k other processes for cpu time."

Nothing about your comment is compatible with my experience. It is certainly not true that a Linux box with 2000 threads blocked on i/o will be having any sort of bad time. If you're really got 2000 threads competing for CPU time then your problem transcends execution architecture: you've simply admitted more work than you can reasonably discharge. Neither threads nor callbacks can solve this problem for you.

Also I'm not sure why you think that the kernel thread scheduler is all that good, or why it shouldn't be considered "outside our control." For my users the kernel thread scheduler is just another black object inside a dark box. The standard scheduler is pretty good for general purposes but I doubt its optimal for any particular case. In some loads it might be useful to yield to a specific thread that you think is holding a mutex your thread needs to acquire. This is cooperative multitasking, basically.