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Comment by chrischen | Hacker News Reader

In Asian culture Asian woman always have a strong preference for other Asians (this is of course generalizing across the different Asian cultures), especially from the same Asian race. But there's a strong fetishizing of Asian women by certain non-Asian men so there's a disproportionate amount of Asian-women-chasing by white men that gets misconstrued as preference by Asian women. If everyone preferred blue M&Ms, you'll simply see more blue M&Ms in everyone's mouths, regardless of their race.

The Asian women fetish is quite unique in that there's really nothing else like it for women of another race present in American culture. You'll find it in pop culture such as Weezer's album "Pinkerton," named after the character from Madame butterfly who marries a Japanese woman.

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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Interracial_marriage_in_the_Uni...

"Asian Americans of both genders who are U.S.-raised are much more likely to be married to Whites than their non-U.S.-raised counterparts."

I found a summary of the study: http://www.slate.com/articles/business/the_dismal_science/20...

"Two wrinkles on this: We found no evidence of the stereotype of a white male preference for East Asian women. However, we also found that East Asian women did not discriminate against white men (only against black and Hispanic men). As a result, the white man-Asian woman pairing was the most common form of interracial dating—but because of the women's neutrality, not the men's pronounced preference."

"Asian Americans of both genders who are U.S.-raised are much more likely to be married to Whites than their non-U.S.-raised counterparts." This statement is not actually related to the point I'm making. Of course it will be true (for so many reasons) since people raised in the US are exposed to, and interact with, non-Asians.

There's no general white male preference. I didn't say that. I'm saying there's a small niche of white males who have fetishes, and it exists where there is no nice of Asian men who prefer white girls, or Asian women who prefer white men. I've seen white males go only for Asian women because of this. And because societal norms across cultures is for the men to chase woman, you'll get some small group of white men who will heavily pursue Asian woman.

Also, from the same article: "Social enterprise research by the Columbia Business School (2005–2007) concluded that while East Asian women statistically prefer East Asian men for marriage, they show no discrimination against White men, causing Asian women/White men pairings to consistently become the prevalent form of interracial dating & marriage in the United States.[6]"

Summary: Asian women prefer Asian men, but do not discriminate White men, so statistically (especially if there is a subset of Asian-fetishizing white men) you'll see more interracial pairings. If one is a latent racist, one might attribute such pairings to an intrinsic desirability for one's race.. OR, one would realize that all things have an objective cause besides the fact that one's own race is always better.

>But there's a strong fetishizing of Asian women by certain non-Asian men so there's a disproportionate amount of Asian-women-chasing by white men that gets misconstrued as preference by Asian women.

It takes two to tango.

Asian woman, especially in the US, would not be strongly against relationships with non-Asian men. Plus the societal norm is for the guy to initiate and pursue. So if you have a small subset of white men who have a fetish for Asian women, you'll naturally get more of those pairings simply because Asian men dont have as much of a fetish for other races as white men do.

If you do the math, you'll also see this. If Asian women had equal preference for white or asian men, you'd see a fairly equal distribution of Asian/White pairings (with that of Asian/Asian). If you take a look outside you'll see there are still vastly greater amount of Asian-Asian pairs than Asian-Nonasian. The Asian-men preference will be greatly less pronounced for Asian American women, but it's extremely strong for Asian born women.

If you don't agree with looking, or you lack a sufficiently large sample size of Asian friends to gather info from, see this quote from Wikipedia:

"Social enterprise research by the Columbia Business School (2005–2007) concluded that while East Asian women statistically prefer East Asian men for marriage, they show no discrimination against White men, causing Asian women/White men pairings to consistently become the prevalent form of interracial dating & marriage in the United States.[6]"

I'm guessing this comment is based on personal experience, perhaps difficulty in success with some Asian women.

I once dated a very attractive Asian woman. What was surprising to me was that lots of Asian guys who would have normally passed me on the street without comment were all of a sudden making snide remarks. It seemed to me that these guys felt like I was stealing one of 'their girls' or something. It's just an anecdote, but it was surprising to me. It probably happens to anyone in a mixed race relationship, in the same way that unattractive guys with a hot girlfriend get comments about 'she can do better than you'.

Im going to have to call you out here. I think you are clearly trying to irk me. But I didn't suggest that white men dating Asian girls is a bad thing, or any racist anti interracial attitude. So I'm not sure what the point of your comment was. It's kind of offensive and latently racist to suggest that I must be Asian and I must be bitter because you took one of "my girls."

Why not just respond to the point I made attempting to explain the prevalence white mail Asian female pairings.

How am I supposed to make my point (assuming I'm right about this) when I've got people like you attacking me with off-topic slightly racist remarks?

Simply not true. As another user pointed out, "it takes two to tango."

And from personal experience, Asian women are just as into white men as white men are into Asian women.

I'm a white guy, and the only women who have ever been super into me immediately after meeting me in a club have been Asian. This has happened multiple times in clubs in SF, LA, Hong Kong, and Shanghai.

Go go Gangnam in Korea. You'll see the xenophobia exhibited by their woman. You'll realize that its latent racism to generalize across all Asian cultures and automatically attribute your dating success to the desirability of your own race. Its also egocentric to generalize one's own limited viewpoint with absolute certainty.

If you come from Asian culture, you'll realize that the poorer will prefer foreign men if for no other reason than for socioeconomic reasons, and for a well-to-do girl where this factor is nonexistent its pretty well known that both genders have a strong preference from their own country (not just for any "Asian").

>The Asian women fetish is quite unique in that there's really nothing else like it for women of another race present in American culture

I wouldn't say it's a fetish for Asian girls(physical traits and sexuality). What attracts many white males is the fact many Asian women are usually more mature, intelligent and feminine than others.

>What attracts many white males is the fact many Asian women are usually more mature, intelligent and feminine than others.

a few too many generalizations there ;)

It is in fact that generalization (which is not true) that makes it a fetish. Its a fetish when you have an unrealistic and unhealthy mental image and obsession with something.

Also imagine what ran through Hitler's mind when he decided to formulate his opinions on Jews. It probably started with some limited interaction with or exposure to them, and it probably turned out negative (in your case regarding Asian women, it turned out positive). He then extrapolated that into a generalization... and then some unimportant things happened next. A negative fetish, if you will.

A wrong idea is bad, regardless of if it is a positive idea or negative one. It makes you disregard other Asian women, or other people, who actually hold those qualities, and it makes you think less of them when they fail to satisfy those qualities. I hope that helps you understand why such generalizations, even if positive, are racially insensitive.

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