Tradeoff is such an intrinsically correct term to use here. People with autism/adhd are worse at some tasks, and better at others. That’s what a tradeoff is.
There are similar discussions around deafness. Deaf people often don’t like to see their deafness as a disability, but as something that defines their culture and experience. That’s still a tradeoff. You can decide to give your child cochlear implants, and integrate them into mainstream schooling - or you can opt out of that, and integrate them into the deaf community. That’s the very definition of a trade off, and it’s a very valid and difficult question.
The issue I have with your take is that its adoption can reduce people’s feelings of agency around their way of life. What works for you isn’t necessarily universal. The idea of a tradeoff is that the same decision can have different meaning to people in varying contexts. You might suggest that people have been conditioned to want to be ‘normal,’ but that is an oversimplification that ignores individuals’ agency, and again, unique contexts.