>How do you find sufficiently qualified and trustworthy partners who are willing to remain on standby for tiny one-off tasks like these?
You spend time up front to find them. With a few hours of up-front work it's not very difficult.
>Moreover many of his bullets just make no sense whatsoever. How am I supposed to outsource "Fixing Post-Launch Bugs" (on my code-base)? Creating Unit Tests? Database Development?
We've outsourced post-launch bugs to a very talented developer who works for us 2-8 hours per week depending on the bugs we find.
Creating unit tests is one of the easiest development tasks to outsource, and you'll find out pretty quickly whether your object model makes sense when you assign this to someone who didn't build the objects themselves.
>I have personally witnessed more than one startup fail spectactularly because the CEO drank a bit too much of the outsourcing kool-aid.
But that doesn't mean outsourcing is bogus, or that it doesn't work.
>it still takes quite a bit of time to bring a contractor up to speed, even on small tasks.
If you're working on a credit card processing system you are correct due to the complexity. But most apps are not this complex, and you'd be surprised how quickly a solid developer can start fixing bugs on a system they've never seen before if they are talented and the architecture is sound.