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Comment by Mahn | Hacker News Reader

Team,

We're cutting 336 people from our workforce. Sorry for that. We'll offer each person a generous exit package and help finding a new job.

Jack

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Team,

336 people will be fired. We hope it brings our stock price back up.

Jack

This is like corporate email golfing, I love it. I propose "Hey" instead of "Team".

Hey,

Stock in the dumps, 336 chumps are fired.

Jack

Plus side: would definitely fit in a tweet.

@jack: "just slimming down my twttr"

Yo,

336 people out. We'll compensate.

employees -= 336

Hey, you stole Elon's schtick: https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/652605371857530880

Twitter's Servers are running autonom. We just do not need you anymore... Thanks... AI

    Error: No payroll records for your username. ("We fixed the glitch!"

That's not far from reality either: https://twitter.com/bartt/status/653946266938818561

> I've been impacted by $TWTR's layoffs. This is how I found out this morning.

[screenshot of iOS account showing inaccessible @twitter.com account]

<3 office space

at least make it rhyme!

Hey, Stock in the dumps, firing 336 chumps. Jack

In this particular example, whats important is keeping the character count under 140, so your proposal wins 1 point. (insert golf clap). I will see your "Hey", and counter propose "Yo". That frees up two characters for use elsewhere vs the original "Team".

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