1. The base offer. Many startups pay competitive or close to competitive salaries + equity. 2. The value of the options depends on your ability to pick the right startup and you believe that you can make a difference to the company. I have a friend who picked the right startup 4 times in a row. 3. Stock options are typically priced at 25% of the last round. The reason this is possible via 409a valuations has to do with the differences between common stock and preferred. 4. Issues with investors right impacting the value of your stock options are more problematic with later stage startups. Warning signs are companies that raised a lot of capital but didn't live up to their expectations. Those companies will often be under pressure to accept terms in later stage financing that could destroy founder and stock option pool upside. 5. Venture Deals by Brad Feld is a great read to understand different investment terms. 6. Yes you get more equity if you create your own company. Doing so is extremely risky, stressful and hard though. I'd guess that even with the extra equity, on average, you'll make more money working for one of the big companies. 7. So in a nutshell, starting companies, joining early stage companies. It really depends on your ability to pick the right company and perhaps more importantly your ability to make a difference.
Well that, and a bit of luck :)