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Comment by Roritharr | Hacker News Reader

If you've stumbled in your reading upon any hints on what to do with a two year old that barely sleeps more than 6 hours a day (including naptime) i'd kill for it.

We're having a neurologist appointment coming up because of it, but I can't shake the feeling we're just the worst parents. :/

We've taken away all screens from him a month ago, but he won't stop waking up at night, trying to breastfeed as much as possible and not falling asleep before 1 AM.

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My sister-in-law only needed 4 hours of sleep a day growing up. Very frustrating for my in-laws. She is in her late 40's now. All this to say, its probably not something you are doing to your son. He might just be that way! :)

This is not strictly accurate. There is some daily mail science about “super humans” who need less than 7-8 hours. And while some people survive like this, your body needs sleep for 7-8 no exceptions. Deep sleep (as important as light sleep) only occurs during long uninterrupted phases. During those phases your body does some amazing things. Amongst other things the production of things like cancer fighting cells and repairing all the physical and mental streses of the day. While not fully understood exactly what, we know the why and lots of good studies prove the correlation between regular quality sleep and better mental and physical well being.

I'm no expert, but my daughter is about to be weaned off the bottle at 1 year. 2 years seems an awful long time for breastfeeding. The key was to get her to bed when she's tired around 6:30 to 7:00 pm with a set routine. Also, I've weaned her off of night feedings by giving progressively smaller quantities at night.

The world health organization recommends to breastfeed only up to 6 months and to keep breastfeeding (foods allowed too) until 2 years old, to give maximum benefits.

So no, 2 years is not necessarily too much.

Maybe get him on some real food. I apparently was an unholy terror that never slept and wanted to feed every hour; my poor mother was probably about ready to smother me with a pillow before my grandmother who had raised ten children convinced her to add in some apple sauce and cottage cheese and oatmeal and that sort of thing.

Well I’m sure you’re not terrible parents. I don’t have children but what I do know about all sleepers is that it’s about routine. Same things every night, in the same order. No screens or other stimulus 2 hours before bed. Exercise or any physical activity close to sleep too, but running around and playing football etc. before meal timed helps, and as for meal times light non carb based meals well before bed. Reading is a great way to unwind and helps the mind. Children have been less of a focus for me but before a neurologist I’d suggest a sleep specialist. They can come to your home and give you some tips. There are even ones focused for children. If you’re in the UK I can help with contacts. I hope that was in some way useful, as sleep experts have said to me regularly, it’s not rocket science it’s dicipline.

Some kids are routine like that, but others not. Mine was good sleeper, but totally irregular.

Also, advice like this underestimate how frustrating and sucking boring killing all joy strict routine can be for parents. You may decide that sleep is not worth it.

Plus there are hard to determine health issues with small ones. Sometime a kid can't sleep and then you figure it is certain food before night or something of the sort.

I don't have advice for your kids sleep problem, but the fact that you noticed this problem and care about it means you're not the worst parents. Parenting is hard, and it sounds like you're trying your best.

Is he waking up near the same time every night? If so, wake him up and re-comfort him before he wakes himself up. Breaks his body's habits, and resets after a week or two (YMMV on the length of time). That was the advice from our (general) doctor.

We also tried gas drops, as we noticed sometimes he just burped and went back to sleep after half an hour of extreme crankiness.

How quick are you to go comfort him when he cries in bed? We did the thing where we let him sort him self out unless he was crying for more then 15-30 min. After a couple weeks they learn to self-soothe. It can be hard emotionally for the parents. Also getting him off the boob and on the food helped. A belly full of babyfood seems to last longer then a belly of milk.

Do you drink a lot of coffee? Anecdotally I was noticing restlessness/sleeplessless with my child when I was caffienated and breast feeding. Going cold turkey there helped a lot. Also if your child is slightly older, feeding him/her with some solid food might be useful. I gave my child mashed avocados, which was a huge hit.

Have you (assuming you are the mother) had your breast milk examined? The baby should be getting plenty of melatonin and tryptophan from your milk, but it is possible for some mothers to have nutrient underproduction issues. Even if they are properly nourished themselves.

Sounded pretty like my daughter at 2. She's much better now though still breast feeds at night a lot - but she's happy and healthy and we are OK - so hang in there - it will get better.

Try co-sleeping, and lots of exercise and new experiences in the day.

Just another parent here... Does he fall asleep easily? What's the room environment like? White noise? Disposable diapers or cloth? Does he have a healthy appetite and diet? Are you still in the room when he falls asleep?

I suppose with a neurologist in the picture, none of the usual things are suspicious though.

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