1. Most HR departments use "Senior Software Engineer" as a catch-all title for techies. Irrespective of the title that work gives you; you should name yourself as an Architect or Technical Lead or Consultant, or all of the above for the various roles that you've done (any other role that you can back up with from your experience and skills). So long as you've been doing that work there is no harm in that. Your skills and experience should back you up in the title, whether or not the actual title of the role was such. If you retain the title of Software Engineer, then that is all that recruiters will view you as.

2. Remember; YOU OWN YOUR CV/RESUME! You can write whatever you like and think will sell you best. Don't say you're a Chess-Grand-Master if you aren't but write that which sells you and your skills and shows them in the best light. You don't need to write everything; focus on your strengths and those areas that show your team leadership and advanced skills. Structure it appropriately and you'll be able to include all your skills (so you appear in search results) and target your strengths.

3. Look for some certifications in an area that interests you that if you tag to your resume/CV will give you the leg up you need. PRINCE 2/PMP/ITIL if you're looking for management leanings; MS/SUN/Oracle architect/DBA certs if you want to keep a foot in dev.

4. Get an MBA or MSc in a specialisation.

5. Find a niche - personally, I'm in Security, but there are plenty of others out there.

6. If your present company won't give you the opportunities, leave and find a place that will. If your skills and experience isn't recognised, then there's no point playing the sucker for them.

7. Double check yourself; the problem may be with you. Work on your soft skills: Make sure people like you (don't become a kiss ass, but just try to get on with people - especially managers); Work on your communication skills (Email, powerpoint, speaking, presenting, mentoring, documenting, making a proposal).

If you don't want to be a slave to a manager/HR hiring you, then you can always go the start-up route. I have little to no experience here, so I'll just leave that hanging as an option. :-)