I've had a fantastic experience on my OnePlus devices over the last few years.
To this point, I would have titled this "hello moto whatever and samsung whatever"
That in and of itself is the basis for a meta-review. The OP says this, in fact:
> I suppose this is really my fault for not spending enough time, not doing enough research, not reading enough forums to buy the correct phone. Maybe some people are just too stupid to deserve a good phone.
and this is one of the reasons why I can't bring myself to buy an Android phone. There's not enough hours in the day to do adequate research, and then, as other comments here note, the experience even changes pretty rapidly as e.g. Google's focus shifts away from the Pixel 2 when they release the Pixel 3!