I'm having the exact same experience. It took me about 10 years to figure it out.

I'm still kind of a workaholic, but I could do way less and it'd be fine. It's also super nice to have a safety net of more and more remote jobs now. Even if the whole economy melts down, people somewhere in the world will still need software built and maintained remotely.

Remote work is so much closer to feeling like it's not a job than office work, which is a huge deal for me.

And you can move to a lower cost of living area, avoid state income taxes, and still have a competitive salary to your city-dwelling peers.

I honestly don't know why everyone isn't remote.