Services like OKCupid actually actively hinder relevant matches unless you pay them and keep paying them. Places like Reddit are hit and miss, heavily dependent on the time you post, and you not only have to risk your privacy to find good matches, you have to gain the approval of everyone else who could remove your post from visibility.
I miss IRC, but of course even that was far from perfect, and had its own risks.
This isn't just about dating, but finding friends with similar interests at all.
With 8 billion people on the planet and all the connectivity, you'd think this would be easier for everyone by now.
Maybe I’m a bit special as I moved countries a fair bit in my 20s, and making friends in adulthood is difficult.
Shameless plug; if you want to join us (we are roughly 400 people) then the network is ircs://irc.drk.sc:6697/#darkscience
Feeling like an outsider is hard to overcome and requires effort from both parties, but it's better if a community does not make a distinction between "outsiders/newbies" versus "regulars" to begin with.
That's the issue. And it's exponentially harder if you weren't able to make friends in childhood either.
Can we make it a little easier through tech?
If you're someone with difficulties to meet new people, you're an easy target.