Hate speech is a loaded term where the connotations are more powerful than the literal definition. Other examples include racist and sexist.

Do you have a sexual preference? In other words, you immediately discount someone based on qualities they were born with and have no control over. That by definition makes you a sexist, but so what. All discrimination is not wrong, like how employers (attempt to) strongly discriminate based on ability.

Hate speech is in the same bucket. It has a murky, varying meaning depending on who you talk to.

I personally also do not believe in "hate speech". Its an attempt to bait-and-switch language, like calling someone hateful when really you just disagree with them, or maybe theyre just rude. Its begging the question.