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This is very difficult, to be sure. Betrayal is a very hard pill to swallow, and the death of a loved one likewise.

You mention Warsaw as a place where things might be better. It looks like you could fly there from NY for maybe $300 on a good day. Is this a plan you could shoot for?

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I am not in NY and it costs a lot more than that as a rule. But that's not even the issue. getting a flight is not a block. It's how to survive long term financially when there. How to legalize without some immigration means which is mostly predicated on money. How to do all that with poor health and people actively fighting you and trying to take away more agency. It's a lot more than just "moving". "Moving" has been my plan since the day I came back from there. I'd have done it then if it was realistic. If money were no object I would have never left, or once here packed up myself and my cat and moved back. Back then my health wasn't good but wasn't as bad and I might have had even some good days. Now it's worse all I want is mostly not miserable days, mostly survivable days. I would accept that. But I cannot even get that.

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