Even if you are emailing an old friend for a favor, put your request up front then put the cordial stuff after, its much more sincere that way.
> Joe, we are looking for advisors to sit on our board. This is a non-paying position so I'm emailing all my old friends and asking for favors. Hey, how are you? How is your wife and son? Either way lets get together soon! --Aaron
I was struggling with this dilemma recently, when wrting an email. Knowing what you just said, that your request should be in the first paragraph, and at the same time wanting to show humman connection, I don't think that I did very good job. Still haven't found a smooth way to express both things in the first sentance/paragraph.
I guess, it depends on the person you are writing to.
It's especially galling when the topic is 'Put your question / point in the first sentence / paragraph' and someone's first word, sentence, and paragraph is simply 'This.'