I wish I had a good answer, but it's similar to exercise. The best food for you is the one that works for you.
I also highly recommend no-food (don't try to twist this). Fasting for various periods is undeniably beneficial for men and women past menopause (younger women should carefully research preventing doing any harm).
Rather than tell you exactly what I eat, I'll tell you that I aim to minimize blood sugar, most of the time(exercise, and simply trying to live a little can change this). And that I also give myself permission to eat outside my boundaries occasionally, though doing so often keeps me on track in the future because of the obvious negative outcomes (which are a lot easier to recognize when you have absolute control over what your ingesting).
The science of nutrition is complex, but I'm sure a lot of programmers would be intrigued by chemistry and equations involved in metabolism. It also changes the way you think about eating. I was fortunate enough to land myself in a tough nutrition class in college, which can look more like organic chemistry.
Edit: to satisfy the downvoters: I'm mostly keto, always low carb unless it's some occasion where I'd otherwise regret not participating. Organic, and well-treated animals are also a staple (and yes, a luxury not available to all).
There are really so many little things that if you or your partner aren't significantly interested in learning about it as a hobby then you're undoubtedly going to miss a lot.
Note: to anyone asking what exactly I eat, why? You don't even know anything about me. What if I'm an athlete? Then what I eat would make a sedentary person obese. Not to mention, VARIETY IS ESSENTIAL. Ideally I would eat every single good thing that's available to maximize my exposure to good things.
Good luck to you!