I am genuinely curious if this is meant to be satire, or if you are actually serious. Poe’s Law and all.
As a child I was writing a letter for my grandmother and naturally used the Macintosh LC III we had just got. My mother was against using the computer as a handwritten letter would be more personal.
So I found a place in the print dialog where you could add different watermarks and chose the one saying "PERSONAL".
No one would want that.
Man is a social animal- especially when at nail salon.