I would say, get your head out of your edge cases. Before I go on, I hope you understand no one is saying its not physically possible, and that it absolutely does not exist anywhere in the multiverse, just that if we come across other life, it will most likely be similar to our own.

by definition, the most probable form of life in the universe is the 1 we are observing. you only need math and probability to figure that out. We also have observational evidence. As far as we can tell, there is no other life in our solar system. We have 8 other planets and many moons that have failed at creating life in any form - that's literally hundreds of billions of years of failed attempts at life.

you can't just pick an element and think its going to work. you need ALL the elements, ALL the states of matter, and the right ratios and amounts of elements to work. Even if you get that lined up, expecting complex life to form under enough pressure to create diamonds in thousands of degrees centigrade also puts the probability of complex life off the table.

I don't known who this is hard to understand. in the simplest example as the article states, if you want to fly, there are things that necessitate something that will fly, such as wings. no wings, no fly. sure its POSSIBLE you can fly without wings, but UNLIKELY. given that we have multiple lineages of evolution taking different paths that end up with the same solution is evidence of that.