Meanwhile it's pretty normal to need to save up for multiple pay periods to buy shoes for your 4 year old. $3k/yr in the pocket makes a difference worth more than delicious coffee to many or most people, even in California.
Shoes for my toddler are $30-$40, and while it’s not a burden for me, it certainly would be if I was only bringing home $1200/month.
As a PhD student I was considerably better off than I had been at any time before that.