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Comment by stodor89 | Hacker News Reader

Yes, it will never again be so easy to find a girlfriend. Yes, it will teach you communication skills that are much harder to develop later on. Yes, in the modern world communication skills are more valuable than tech skills, full stop.

Still, generic advice isn't applicable to everyone, so if you honestly find staying home and writing code more in line with your guiding principle than spending time with a girl, then sure, do that instead.

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If it was so easy to 'get a girlfriend' in high school, you wouldn't have all these people giving this advice. They are suggesting it precisely because they feel like they missed out themselves.

You take it for granted in high school. It isn't, which is why this kind of advice shows up so often.

not to sound ignorant, so apologies if I come across like that, but are specific communications skill you learn? I thought you get experienced enough with conversations with teachers, friends and parents haha. Or if you're talking about flirting and taking risks thats unique.

Read up on attachment theory. Having a healthy relationship with a caregiver is necessary for social and emotional development. Lots of people don’t have that, for various reasons, but having a healthy relationship with a partner can also serve this purpose. Alternatively, therapists can help a little bit with this too, but there is no substitute for healthy intimacy.

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