It reads like a telephone (gone through India?) mod of that version I am more familiar with:

>Tech Enthusiasts: Everything in my house is wired to the Internet of Things! I control it all from my smartphone! My smart-house is bluetooth enabled and I can give it voice commands via alexa! I love the future!

Programmers/Engineers: The most recent piece of technology I own is a printer from 2004 and I keep a loaded gun ready to shoot it if it ever makes an unexpected noise.[0]

[Security technicians: (takes a deep swig of whiskey) I wish I had been born in the Neolithic.]

[0]https://biggaybunny.tumblr.com/post/166787080920/tech-enthus...