I'm definitely a YIMBY but red states are coming from a place of much lower density. They will certainly get these problems as they get more density.

Which red state area is more dense than SF?

That's because conservative areas are rural. When they become dense enough to have urban problems, they inevitably become liberal. So then we get to paint the urban problem as a liberal one, when in reality it is orthogonal.

Conservatives say they love cars but they hate it when I drive my car*

You have to evaluate the context of the action. "not building stuff" and "building stuff" can both be conservative at different places or times.

* I drive on the sidewalk

what about NYC?