Hacker News Reader

Comment by gregjor | Hacker News Reader

I have to ask, for what? I raised three kids without cameras. My wife and I used the time-tested "monitoring" technique: we kept our own eyes on the kids. It wouldn't have occurred to me to watch my kids on camera through a phone or laptop when I could just have them in the same room with one of us. Maybe we just got lucky, but in my experience babies and toddlers can sleep through almost anything if you hold them or keep them close by.

The questions seems to ask how to turn a very human activity into a technical problem.

View on HN

This is such an annoying response. "How can I do X?" "Tsk tsk, I didn't have to/want to do X so don't waste your time.

> Maybe we just got lucky, but in my experience babies and toddlers can sleep through almost anything if you hold them or keep them close by.

You did just get lucky. Full stop. Some kids are bad sleepers and when they are, OP might want to be on a different floor. Maybe they want to hang out in the yard or on on the porch where they won't hear a child screaming. Maybe they are working from home and just want to be able to keep an eye on the child without needing to be in the same room.

No matter what the reason, responding to a request for advice on doing X with condescending tongue-clicking doesn't help with anything other than making yourself feel superior. Congrats!

I asked, "For what?" How will camera monitors help with bad sleeping or screaming? When my kids had those episodes we would hold them or lay down with them, maybe with earplugs. Monitoring an upset child through a camera just seems callous to me, but everyone does their own thing. My mom followed the "let them cry it out" school and thought I should do the same.

I worked from home most of the time when I had three kids growing up. Less than ideal sometimes but it wasn't so bad.

Call it condescending tsk-taking or annoying if you want. You asked for validation of an Amazon shopping list of hardware, I suggested an alternative approach to think about. Happy monitoring.

indeed.

also knowing how/if your kid is climbing out of a crib, if their sleeping position is causing issues. it could prove to be really useful to assess these things early/passively rather than late/intrusively.

there's something to be said for not literally being present 24/7 with your child for various other reasons that can be found online and in books.

I know the topic brings on a wave of heated opinions. Our kids all slept with us, or in a baby bed next to our bed, from birth until they wanted to sleep in their own bedroom, usually before two years old. No need for a crib or worry about sleeping positions.

I didn't suggest hovering over children 24/7. But consider that people have raised kids for millennia without cameras and monitors, more connected with the child and not remotely observing and assessing.

That goes against current guidelines on sleep for babies.. the risk of SIDS drops when the baby sleeps on their own rather than with their parents.

People existed for a long time without lots of things we have today. Should we stop using lots of stuff?

> That goes against current guidelines on sleep for babies.. the risk of SIDS drops when the baby sleeps on their own rather than with their parents.

True, but if you look at the studies you see alcohol and drugs involved, parents who smoke, babies sleeping with parents on sofas, improper bedding, low birth weight and other risk factors, etc. A hard mattress, light bedding, and a baby bed that can go between the parents or on the side of the bed eliminates most of the risks. Pediatrician advice on this topic has gone from "never do it under any circumstances" to "don't smoke, drink, do drugs, or let babies sleep on soft mattresses with heavy bedding." Babies should not sleep prone. Parents all over the world routinely sleep with babies and young children with no increased SIDS rate, probably because they don't use padded soft mattresses and heavy bedding. Cribs and baby bedding and toys cause their own problems.

> People existed for a long time without lots of things we have today. Should we stop using lots of stuff?

Not really an argument, since I was referring to a single specific practice, not "lots of stuff." At one extreme you have Balinese mothers who carry their babies everywhere and sleep with them. At the other you have parents who hire nannies and keep their children in separate rooms under video surveillance. Because raising children is a very personal and human activity I don't get why people would introduce unnecessary distance or technology, but everyone can find their own way.

Pediatrician advice is still that babies should sleep on their own - without toys and other objects in the crib.

Of course it's an argument. Why would you apply the logic to a single specific practice and hand wave away everything else? Makes no sense.

So condescending. Parenting discussions bring out the worst in people.

Like much with parenting I think it’s only people trying to do what they think they ought to do and the plan - like most - may not survive reality’s punch in the face.

Everyone learns parenting on the job.

You're right about learning parenting on the job, and about the best-laid plans.

Reply on news.ycombinator.com