Wow. My most permanent temporary solution is a doorbell extender I hacked out of an ESP-01 and a buzzer. Whenever the doorbell rings, a door sensor (with a magnetic reed switch) _inserted into the doorbell_ closes, sends a Zigbee packet to my coordinator, which then turns it into an MQTT message, which then gets picked up by Node-RED and re-mapped to the buzzer, which gets it via Wi-Fi.

But some of the solutions on that thread actually make me comfortable with the way this works...