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I'm confused, Tesla FSD doesn't exist?

You have to pay for it. I believe it’s only available as a monthly subscription instead of buying it outright.

Isn't what's available now a supervised mode that can throw back controls to you and can't handle arbitrary driving?

Since when did "Full Self Driving" not mean full and not mean self?

It's more of a "where" than a "when". They call it Tesla Assisted Driving in Europe.

Other countries are more lax about what words mean.

If you purchased have a Hardware Version 3 in either a 3 or a Y, FSD does not exist in Australia.