It suddenly hit me, I wonder if the sysadmins had installed DBD::SQLite...yes they had!
Why mess with all that crap if I could just use SQLite. Reasonably fast indexing, expressive searching tools, I could dump the data onto disk and use an in memory SQLite db at the same time, caching solved. It turned weeks of agonizing work (producing fragile code) and turned it into a quick 2 week coding romp. The project was a huge success and spread to a couple other departments.
One day they asked if I could advise a group to build a more "formal" implementation of the system as they were finding the results valuable. A half dozen developers and a year later they had succeeded in building a friendlier web interface running on a proper RDBMS (Oracle 10something) with some hadoop goodness running the processing stuff on 8 or 9 dedicated machines.
In the meantime, and largely because SQLite let me query into the data in more and more useful ways that I hadn't foreseen, I had extended the original prototype significantly and it was outperforming their larger scale solution on a 3 year old, very unimpressive, desktop with the same install of perl and sqlite. On top of the raw calculations, it was also performing some automated results analysis and spitting out ready to present artifacts that could be stuck in your presentation tool of choice. Guess which ones the users actually used?
Soon I had a users group, regular monthly releases and was running a semi-regular training class on this cooky command line tool (since most users had never seen a command line). I've since finished that job up and moved on, and last I heard my little script using SQLite was in heavy use, the enterprise dev team was still struggling getting the performance of their solution up to the levels of my original script, and hadn't even touched the enhancements yet.
SQLite was rock-iron solid the entire time. I had a few things I wished it could do, but I usually found a way to manage. I wasn't using it for its feature, it existing was the feature. SQLite sprinkled magic on my one-off hack job and turned into a thing that people ended up using.