I quickly interpreted "abuse" as "shouting abuse", but if it meant that he hurt her physically, that brings him way down obviously. You have to assume a lot to make any judgement at all, which was my point.

One point of view not many share, but I do at some level, is that none of these people are guilty of anything more than being who they are, which they had no control over. In those terms, they're all morally equal and deserve unconditional compassion.