CallMeV

Forget about you. Set aside your skills, your intelligence, the money you earn or the prospects you have.

Pick up on a different kind of intelligence. Social intelligence. Emotional intelligence. Learn body language. Train yourself to observe people.

Talk about the person; not about you. Open conversations with lines such as "How can I help you?" "How are you?" and comments intended to make the first main topic of conversation the person you are speaking to.

The order of conversations should be: The person you are speaking to, then some neutral third party topic that is possible of mutual interest, then finally you can open up the conversation about you - but hesitantly, as if it were an afterthought.

Start with the above. I leave the acquisition of further experience and refinement of your social tool use to you.

You become happy through a combination of factors.

First, resolving not to do anything beyond a level that you would recognise as "hard work." You set the bar on what level of work you would call "hard" and stick to that level.

Second, knowing when a certain amount of income is enough, and working to maintain that income level so people get used to you working at this level. If you keep putting in overtime to get more money, sooner or later the bosses will start thinking that they're underworking you and suddenly you'll be swamped.

Third, maintaining your ripcord. Put aside your "fuck you" money and save it. Add to your pot and forget about it unless and until you need it.

Fourth, making your work environment the place where you earn your money - not the arena in which your life is played out. Your colleagues are not your whole life. Work in the hours you have to, but live your life the rest of the time.

Fifth, don't bring work into your home life. Assert your right to bring your home life into your work. Let them see how unimportant work is to you.

Sixth, even if your home life and work life are tied up, everybody crowding you at home and at work, make certain that you have something to do that is entirely your own. Whatever it is, this is the thing you genuinely love. Share this with no one.

Seventh, become a polymath. Get interested in a whole bunch of things, not just your work. Imagine if you pick up mental arithmetic from reading of the Trachtenberg Method and start teaching it to your kids so they won't be afraid of maths. Now imagine picking up skill in a musical instrument, swimming, studying body language and learning Portuguese. All at once. Come on. It's fun.

Finally, the only way to be happy is to choose to be happy; to understand that you own your time, and to respond accordingly. Being happy comes first. Everything else is just gravy, because it's all something you will want to do.

Me, I'm broke, between jobs and under pressure to find one fast. And yeah. I'm ecstatically happy. And damned if nobody can figure out why.

In short, the same way a musician in NY finds his way to Carnegie Hall. Practice.

Fascinating article.

But how can a company possibly stay alive for very long if, rather than confining itself to lying to its rivals to keep ahead in the competitive marketplace, it starts lying to itself and its own?

If your company's internal culture develops the practice of deceit - deceit between superiors and subordinates, deceit between superiors, deceit between subordinates and ultimately deceit towards customers - how can you expect the firm to remain fit for purpose for very long?

Who would want to live in a Stirnerite environment where everybody routinely bones up on Machiavelli and Nineteen Eighty Four and keeps the knives sharpened while watching for others attampting to stab you in the back all the time?