boredaway

Thanks for the advice!

I have actually thought about changing my line of work, but whenever I find something interesting about software dev, I just can't see myself doing anything else.

Part of the frustration I feel, I think, has to do with not being able to do something that actually adds value to the business, and in general feeling like my position is just useless, not necessarily the line of work per se.

I've been doing software dev for more than 15 years an I've loved pretty much every minute of it, so even though I'm definitely interested in other things, like cooking, I just don't see myself doing that for a living.

Also, funnily enough, the company I work for has a really interesting mission, it's just that my position in particular feels pointless and directionless, and the management team doesn't seem to care or know how to fix that.

I am definitely trying, but it's just very very hard to have the motiviation.

Trying a bit of cooking and chess (so not related to software dev) and although I enjoy it, I have a hard time remembering stuff (e.g. chess openings).

Same for software dev stuff (e.g. reading Designing Data Intensive applications, which is great and interesting, but having a hard time reading more than 2 or 3 pages before drifting off)

Thanks for the advice though. Definitely looking to keep pushing in that front.

I'm not sure if I am even able to buy that without a prescription and am a bit worried about health side-effects, but I do appreciate the suggestion.

I guess I would need to talk to a doctor first, and perhaps they will find it appropriate that I do take meds in my case.

I've experienced burnout before (when working about 16 hrs a day, 7 days a week, being an engineer for Big Tech at the same time as trying to build my own startup... bad idea in restrospective) and this is something different albeit very easy to confuse with it.

The stress is there, the self-esteem issues are there, as well as the feeling that there's just no way out of it, so it took me a while to figure out it was boreout and not burnout.

If you are able to take a year off, definitely seems like a great idea.

I have fantasized about that for a while but unfortunately even though I've been saving for a long time, it's nowhere near enough for a full year, since I have dependants. I am able to take off about 3 months and am seriously considering it.

That is something I have been thinking about (going freelance) but the few times I've tried, the projects are just sooo crappy and messy that I just don't see myself doing that.

I have not been able to figure out how to handle cleints that want to have technical input (i.e. no, the way you are asking me to build your online store will not work and will just leave me on the hook when it fails), so I always shy away from that kind of work.

Definitely considering it though. I guess I just need to figure out where to learn how to handle clients.

Thanks!

Thanks for the suggestions. A few comments:

For 1) I am saving as much as I can, but definitely thinking of eating my savings is frightening. I already did that a few years ago where I used up all my savings to start a startup and nothing came out of it (monetarily, albeit I did got tons of experience), so doing that again feels paralyzing. Definitely aiming for, say, using up savings for at most 3 months (ideally).

For 2) that is an odd one, although I do understand the reasoning. I never really burn bridges when I leave beacause you never know what the future holds, and like I said, the people in this company are actually nice, so no issues there. I do find it weird to think about coming back because I am don't think things will change any time soon.

For 3) One of the things that makes me feel paralyzed is that after some 3-4 years in startups, and after doing my own for about 4 years, I feel like maybe a regular 9-5 is what I need. Of course, "the grass is greener on the other side" applies here, and that's why I find it hard to jump ship.

In any case, just hearing others' opinions does help and appreciate your thoughts on this. Also, definitely not taking it as professional advice so no worries :)

Thanks for sharing.

Definitely trying to exit.

It just feels very hard to study enough to be able to get a decent job. Everything feels so dull and uninteresting.