lost

thank you for all your commments so far.

I wouldn't blindly follow malicious advice but really I do need to find somehow to snap out of this so I value what others might say.

I guess I should, I can't really think what though. any ideas?

ok, reading.

1) I hate myself too much to let anybody close to me, I am working on this though. 2) the kind of things I code I have been reasearching for years and working hard but nobody seems to care, everything has already been done before too.